An Open Essay

I have a secret. 

I’ve overcome depression and anxiety more than once in my life. 

Lately I’ve been feeling pressed by God to share my story. But the secret isn’t where I struggle, the secret is in how unqualified I feel to speak about this.

I don’t feel ready because I’m not over it yet. Right now, I’m right in the middle of another hard season of battling it. It’s still fresh to me. I know how it consumes and robs you when you least expect it. How you can’t back down from the highs and lows sometimes, and how ostracized you can feel when trying to explain those emotions to others.

I can’t preach to you from the “promised land,” but I can promise you I’ve tasted it, and I know the well worn path to the only man who can help you get over there. 

I know because I’ve been there before, and because I’m fighting my way back through it right now. 

I’ve shared my story before in pieces, but I’ve never wanted to become an “expert” on the topic, because it’s been a continuous battle for me.

I’m not always depressed or anxious, but I have walked through many traumatic things in my life that can be unfortunately triggered, and as a result, over my life I’ve battled in both minor and major ways.

So, I’m being honest here guys. I’m no expert. I have no “lasting” 3 steps to freedom program.

But, what I do have is strategies & resources.

What I do have is an unrelenting faith in Jesus.

What I do have is the transparency and vulnerable authenticity of my own story.

In short, I do have something, however small, that can help.

So when I share about it here, it’s not to say “this is the only way” to get healing, but hopefully to highlight that you aren’t alone. To remind you that not everything is healed instantaneously, and yes, there is a great deal we have to fight to overcome.

But, I also come to remind you there is hope and healing available; that there is a beautiful life full of abundance here on earth, in the middle of the hard. A life that so very worthy of your effort and fight.

I hope my words share the way not to instant freedom, but to His feet.

I, dear sisters, am powerless on my own to set you free, but I do know someone who will. I know someone with a unique plan just for you, and even better, I know someone who is more than willing to make space and sit with you in it, however long it takes.

So, I’ll share what I do know, how I’m growing and learning, and how, even if you don’t suffer, you can support those you love who do. I’m sharing to help, even in the tiniest way for someone not to quit and give up the fight.

It’s going to be messy, imperfect, I might say something wrong, or you may not understand, but it’s my hope you will pray with me that those who need Jesus would find Him, and learn strategy for the days that come.

So, if you’d do me a favor, drop a note below and tell me what you’d like to know or you hope I discuss. Make it real, I want to be as useful as possible.

And I ask for your prayers as we go.

Let’s go.